Things I am not terrible at
1) Speed eating
2) Avoiding responsibility
3) Pretending to know things
Five More Unnecessary Facts
1) I have Hitchhiker’s thumb. This is the only cool thing about me, and it’s not even that cool.
2) If you are alive, chances are I crave your approval.
3) I rely heavily on self-deprecating humor.
4) I regularly post on Sunday evenings, the time when master procrastinators such as myself feel the most alive.
5) I go through so many life crises that, to simplify things, I have begun to regard my entire life as one big crisis.
6) I can’t count.